firsts.

this past weekend i hosted my first retreat.. i was sick as a dog so i was honestly dreading the weekend.. i was afraid i wasn't going to be able to serve the group like i wanted to with the spirit i wanted to. God proved to be big again. why do we even doubt!? why are we even anxious and why do we even worry?! sometimes i don't get why we do all these things when we KNOW he is in control. i guess thats the flesh in us. the group was so easy to take care of. they were so organized and so easy going. it was such a blessing to me because it made my work load light and stress levels low. all which helped my sick body heal. i thought i might not be prepared to host a retreat, but God proved other wise. i may not have been ready, but He was ready to serve through me. He made things smooth and prepared me to work out the details and the requirements that were needed to be done to host a retreat.. what a big God we serve. what an AWESOME God we serve.

the interns and i just got back from our first CCCA (camp and conference center association) sectional conference. it was 3 days and 2 nights in northern pa at tuscarora inn. the camps that were in the region all came together to meet, talk, fellowship, worship, learn in workshops, learn from speakers, and to connect with each other. i was very excited to experience the conference because i knew i would learn a lot from like minded people who were already in the camp ministry. i hear encouraging, honest, real, discouraging, sad, hopeful, and glorifying stories about the lives of people and the situations of some camps. i realized i have been blessed to work at 2 very healthy successful camps. it may not have always been that way and there may be hard times in the future, but i have been blessed to be part of the great times. i have learned so much from sandy cove and rvr about camp ministry and i am so thankful for that experience. i am also thankful to have been able to go the sectional and learn more about other camps and how they run. i went to a marketing class for the fun of it. i have no experience or really knowledge of anything that marketing entails except for the obvious things. the workshop was led by gregg hunter who is the new CEO/president of the CCCA. he definitely knows his stuff and i took 3 pages of notes in the class! i was a little nervous to go to that workshop because i knew it was going to be an interactive one and i knew with my little knowledge and experience with marketing that i wouldn't have much to offer the group or the people. i ended up just listening to the other directors and workers share their situations and the others giving advice and it was very informative. i didn't contribute to the conversations, but i was surprised that i could actually relate and that i did have experiences to share if needed or i wanted to. i guess i sell myself short at times.. another bad habit. :) it was an overall great experience that i got to share with both the interns from rvr and my previous boss' from sandy cove. both groups i consider family so what better way to spend time at a conference. on a side note they brought in a husband and wife who had this hilarious game show set up called the brain show. it was so much fun and i got to participate with 2 other interns.. my previous boss' were chosen to participate as well.. TOO FUNNY.

today we got back from the sectional after a 40 min stop to change a flat tire.. eh, no biggie for these ranch boys.. glad it wasn't my car or it would have been a few hours.. we ran through our winter meltdown program that starts tomorrow night! yea, it was the first time we ran through it.. crazy i know. my role is to recite 4 poems (from memory!) to a couple 100 kids each session.. yeah, im pretty nervous. ok, really nervous so if you think of it please say a prayer for me! the poems are memorized, but you know sometimes how your mind can blank when you are nervous.. this is something i am trying to trust the Lord with that He will speak through me.. well, here is to tomorrow! Lord, please give me the memory that is strong enough to remember the poems that i have memorized. thank you that they are already memorized.. i know that was You. please use this winter meltdown to touch the lives of the youth who come through and may it all be used for your glory! i love you!! amen,

following Him,
beth.

what hope is found in this..

so, i have been reading a one year Bible every day that takes me through Genesis, Matthew, Psalm, and Proverbs each reading. i have realized i am a huge fan of this. keeps my mind occupied. i must admit that i am excited when it comes time for me to sit down and read. i have never been much of an old testament kind of person (which we should be a whole Bible kind of people! ha), but i have always had a desire to learn from it and know the history of it. yeah, i know the sunday school stories, but i have never taken the time to really sit and read it all. there are certain old testament books that i love and have read and studied quite a bit, but the time has come that i need and want to learn about it all. i didn't really have any expectations about how i would feel or what would be spoken to me reading through Genesis, but i didn't expect to have a passion and desire to read more and more of it. i am loving reading through Genesis. i have loved reading about abraham and his wives and children. when reading about him and his journey i have come across some odd and somewhat disturbing facts about his life and at the same time these facts give me and believers everywhere hope. see abraham lied and said that his wife sarah was his sister. (i know she really was, but he wasn't telling the truth by not saying she was his wife) i realize this was done out of fear and in hopes of protecting both of them, but it struck me as odd. didn't abraham fully trust that the Lord would take care of him?? wasn't that what he is known for? wasn't abraham a man that was so close to the Lord and one that the Lord loved and trusted and saw his complete devotion to him?? yeah, he was. abraham made some weird decisions and mistakes, but the Lord still loved him, called him to greatness, used him, trusted him, blessed him, and called him one of his own! what a hope is found in that we too can be all those things even when we lack faith and make mistakes! abraham was still used by God and was blessed and used immensely. when realizing this my mind was directed to the life of david. david was considered a man after God's own heart after all the horrible things he did!! that should give all of us believers hope that we too can be men and women after God's own heart no matter what we have done. it matters where your heart is now.. it matters what your actions are now.. not what you have done and where you have been. i have a hope that means it is never too late to live for the Lord with a heart that is completely devoted to Him..

Lord, thank you for these reminders through your word and your truth. may i continue to see hope and truth through my readings through all you have written. may i never forget that you love us through everything we have done. may i never look back on where i have been, but rather look forward to how i can grow and serve you better.

filled with hope,
beth.

His joy is our strength.

this is this months pathfinder, check it out!!
https://mail.wrbs.com/owa/WebReadyView.aspx?t=att&id=RgAAAAAhrzljgNRzSb%2fi1T2kCxaVBwA2tLD5crKZSrBQK9Ap54jJAAAO9NnZAAA2tLD5crKZSrBQK9Ap54jJAAAZVObvAAAJ&attid0=EACQqntpy%2bPGTbUmxwptSiIo&attcnt=1

i am a blessed girl. i am learning how to be patient and put my hope in the Lord. if He is for us, who can be against us? i mean really, who could possibly match up to our Lord who always take care of us? absolutely no one. take heart in that. no one is bigger than God. no one is bigger than the plans He has for us. what an awesome promise to stand on. keep standing on His truths.

in Him,

beth.

ringing in the new year.

man, it's 4 days into the new year already.. the past week has been a very fun and eventful one. we got back to the ranch last sunday and started work the next day. we did some cleaning and preparing for winter meltdown as well as the rvr staff reunion that was also last week. we had to come back so soon after Christmas because we had a huge group that came last monday as well. so we also helped host the retreat. as soon as the retreat group left we cleaned up camp so that the rvr staff who were coming for the reunion would have somewhere clean to stay :) our job during the reunion was to be present and to have fun/ hang out with the staff. we had so much fun, but let me tell ya i am still tired and haven't caught up on my rest yet. the first night the staff was here was new year's eve.. we made dinner and then we headed down to the inner harbor in baltimore.. it was sooo much fun.. cold and rainy, but still so much fun.. we danced around and walked around.. got some good coffee and the watched fireworks while dancing/ welcoming the new year in. they were the best fireworks i have ever seen. totally legit. the next day we had the traditional flag football game and dodge ball tournament.. dessa and i were 2 of 4 girls who played.. we tore it up. yeah girl :) not to mention we got a little muddy..ok a lot muddy. us 6 interns were a dodge ball team and we tore it up as well. we got 2nd place, but it was a great fight and a really big deal.. :) haha ok it wasn't, but it was still really competitive. haha that night the traditional ranch coffee house took place.. some pretty great acts and pretty funny acts were performed. dess, sarah, and i sang girls just wanna have fun in ridiculous outfits.. yeah, we had fun if you were wondering.. the next morning (sat) the staff ate breakfast and then went back home... as soon as they were gone sarah, taco, and i loaded up my car and headed over to sandy cove for my summer staff reunion there. we were allowed to bring guests and i wanted to show them the cove and spend time with them as well. so, i was in charge of the whole reunion.. i must say that it was a lot more than i thought and i don't usually get stressed out, but i was feeling the stress without being stressed out if that makes sense. we probably had about 50 people show up.. it was such an awesome time catching up on relationships made during the summer. even though part of planning an event is stressful, it is very rewarding.. watching people laughing together, talking together, eating together, and re-connecting was such a rewarding feeling. it did bring me great joy that everyone else was enjoying their time. some of us played games, some just talked, some played hide and seek, some walked around, and some played signs.. i thank the ranch for introducing that game to me.. we played till midnight and had so much fun.. the next morning we had breakfast and then a small service i tried to put together.. Stephen led worship for me, which was great and so helpful to me and then we did a small devotional on living a different story.. living like Caleb who stood out among the others who doubted the land that the Lord had promised them.. hopefully, it spoke to them as much as it spoke to me when i did the devo. i spent the rest of the day relaxing and watching football with Stephen :) for dinner i met on of my bestfriend's danielle and her family.. it was great to catch up with them. they were a 2nd family for me during my senior year of softball at liberty. this brings me to today, which is Taco's birthday! happy birthday Taco! we went snowboarding/ skiing for the day, which ended up being 2 hours because carly got hurt pretty bad. so we got vouchers for a free day later on, which is sweet because we got a few hours free of boarding.. it was almost like the Lord knew what we needed. i haven't sat and relaxed and just spent time reading/ spending time with the Lord in a while.. i have really been on the go for a week straight.. not to mention driving a lot. i don't want to look at this situation as a good one because it's not good she got hurt, but i like to look at it like good things can come from any situation. so the gang were all good sports about it and we decided to leave early. it's like we all needed some rest and down time.. man, Lord thank you so much for working all situations for your good and ours as well. may we always look for the good in every situation. up next is another busy week i am sure, but i know i will be getting more rest! i will make myself! :)

grace and peace,
beth.

tis the season.. how i love it so!

i should probably stop talking about how it's been a while since i posted and just start posting more! haha :) guilty.

well, we just got back from Christmas break and have jumped right back into work. it felt weird working again, but it is so great to be back and with the interns! i missed them so much. to catch yall up on what has been going on i will list some things! the week before we left for home we had a Christmas party/ get together every night for 4 nights straight! monday through thursday we worked during the day and had Christmas parties at night! so much fun, but really exhausting. we had a staff wide party at Shine FM in baltimore who is part of Peter and John Ministries. the Ranch is also part of P&J Ministries. it was so fun to see how the station works and putting faces to the voices you hear on the radio! that night we had a party for the community around the ranch. i believe i mentioned that before in the last blog. it was a great way to get to know the neighbors. i played with the kids all night.. too much fun :) the next morning we had a just ranch staff gift exchange. i got an awesome travel coffee mug from Morgan. woohoo! more parties followed.. it was a great time connecting with others, but i really do feel exhausted after weeks like that.. i needed some down time and alone time for sure. on friday Matt let us leave early right after lunch because of the blizzard that was coming! good thing he did because it hit and left us under 18inches of snow! absolutely beautiful! well, instead of going home i drove to my friend carly's house who had just gotten back from Africa. she was there for 3 months. i ended up being snowed in at her house for 3 days! didn't bother me any :) :) we had a lot of catching up to do anyways. it was great to reconnect and hear about how God worked in her down in Africa. then the long trek home.. ugh.. 4 hours turned into 7 hours.. thank you traffic and snow on the sides of the roads. spent a great week at home spending much needed down time and quality time with friends and family.. you ever wish you could clone yourself and be 20 places at once?? sometimes i do because there are so many friends i want to see and spend time with.. i havent even gotten to spend time in the burg yet!! i will make it there, mark my words! i had a great Christmas with a special guest! Stephen came down for Christmas eve and morning. it was one of my favorite Christmas presents :) as great as it was to see family and spend time with them it can also be tough. let's just say my last day home wasn't the best.. arguments, bad memories, and the struggle with guilt weighed heavy on my heart for a few days.. the Lord's love endures forever and for that i am grateful.. he washes me clean and white as snow daily. thank you Lord for new days, new chances, and new opportunities to grow and learn from mistakes. thank you for being my refuge. i did my devotional yesterday and it was on how the Lord is our refuge.. it is something we always hear, but i had never taken the time to look into what a refuge really is. i discoved that it is a safe place. God is my safe place.. He is the person i run to and the person i feel completely safe with. where i know i am forgiven and where i am learning. i can't imagine not having Him to run to.

a little update on what is happening now.. we are continuing to prepare for Winter Meltdown! Winter Meltdown is an event we put on for 100's of youth for 6 weekends. We want to challenge them to grow in the faith and for some start the new journey of following the Lord. Working on the set and OTM trying to get the building looking tip top for the event. i have been assigned to read 4 poems from memory. not gonna lie i am very nervous! i have 1 memorized and half of the really really long one i have to do. i know i will have them memorized in time, but i am afraid i will feeze. it's weird cause i am a huge people person and i can be in front of large amounts of people and be fine.. but having to memorize something makes things more nerve wrecking for me.. make sense? haha if God brought me to it He will bring me through it!! just gotta believe it! :) positive self talk.. learning that too! ;) the poems i have to read are deep. i mean deep for kids! and kids wrote these poems! the one that wasn't written by kid's is really long.. i have memorized a little over half, but the catch is that it is slam poetry.. that means i have speak it with a lot of soul.. funny they choose me.. :) i am excited yet very nervous.. pray for me! :)

i will update more on this week when it's over.. it is a very eventful week.. we have a very large group in now and we have the summer staff reunion mid week for RVR.. it's a new years thing so we will be working new years pretty late, but it will be fun!

along the journey,
beth.

oh happy day.

yesterday and today we have been preparing for a community Christmas party that we host for all the neighbors of RVR. we are pretty loud in the summer and we bring in a lot of traffic to the area. in appreciation of our neighbor's great attitudes and patience with us we throw them a Christmas party. so the interns have been helping decorate and set up inflatables for the kids.. these inflatables are massive.. we washed them out all day yesterday and then patched the holes today.. we may have then played in and on them for a good bit of the day :) one of many reasons i love my job, but another reason i love my job is that we reach out to the community.. we don't just sit in our bubble and let people come to us. we go to them and we show them the love of the Father we believe in. it's a great opportunity that we have here at a place like this.. the same goes for other camps as well. after lunch we had our 2nd Old Testament class.. i love this class. it really challenges me and makes me think a lot about my faith and what i believe. it also teaches me a lot of what i don't know which i realized is more than i thought. today we talked about how the life of Moses foreshadowed the life of Christ. it was some pretty amazing stuff and pretty neat to see how the Lord was working out his plan through one man's life. the topic of prayer was then brought up and why we pray for healing if the Lord already has His perfect plan.. something in me just lit up.. i started thinking that if my prayers don't mean anything and they have no effect then what am i doing? but i know they do and i know they are heard. the Bible commands us to pray and to pray for one another.. i may not understand the mind of God, but i know that he wants to hear from us and He wants to answer our prayers.. it may not be the way we expect, but nonetheless they are answered. and for that it is a happy day. :)

beth.

thanksgiving/updates/thoughts. :)

ahhh its been too long since i have written.. i guess i am just having too much fun ;) well when i wrote last i was on thanksgiving break.. i had a great break, i got to speak to my church about my trip to china (which went great), i got to catch up with high school friends, and hang with my family.. i love my family, but it's hard to be around sometimes.. i guess all families have their issues. see i'm not who i used to be, i've come a long way since i have lived at home. the Lord has really brought me a long way from then. when the same issues that go down with my family happen i now get sad. sad because i can't change them. sad because i used to be them. sad because i want so badly to open their eyes. i used to be angry. i used to be a mad kid and just react with anger. that's how they knew me and that's how they think i am going to react now, but i don't and i think it is taking a little while for them to realize that i have changed. it's almost like they don't wanna believe that i have changed. i know they do realize it, but it's hard to accept i guess. it's a learning process and i know that good will come from all situations. over the break i had an amazing devotion on forgiveness. i had always felt that i am a pretty forgiving person, but i guess the Lord showed me that i was leaving some people out. there is a lot of family history that i would need to explain, but for the lack of space and time i can not explain it all. i have forgiven my father for a lot of things that have happened, but i realized that i don't forgive my siblings. my siblings are living like i used to live. i used to live with a me mentality that i must look out for myself and protect it at all costs.. its a selfish one and it makes you angry when things don't go your way. i hadn't been forgiving them for being like that. it hurts me to see it and it hurts to be treated that way, but i realized i need to forgive them and be patient with them. the Lord forgave me for being like that and had patience with me. it may be taking them longer, but that doesn't mean i shouldn't forgive and have hope that life will turn around for them. it's a learning process that i am on.
so after break i went to house sit for my family at sandy cove. it was so great to spend time with their only daughter, kat. she is a great girl with a good head on her shoulders.. i'm hoping the Lord will use me to be an example and an encouragement in her life. i am probably not the best example, but i do know that i wanna be used by Him. we stayed up too late talking about life, but it's worth it to be a listening ear.
got back to the ranch and started right back into work. i was gone for 10 days and it made me realize how much i missed these guys! the interns have become my family without a doubt. i have never been in such a tight knit group with the same goals in mind. it really brings us close together. the girls are becoming some of my best friends and the guys are just my buds. i really have been blessed to be a part of this group. we did some cleaning and had some classes on the history of our retreat programming and also an old testament survey class.. i must admit i am excited about learning more about the old testament. well, guess what. i went to another chic-fil-a grand opening last week. :) it was crazy. everyone in our group made the first 100! it was a crazy story. you have to get there the day before at 6am. at 6 they take everyone there. if it is less than 100 they will let more people in who were later and if it is at 100 they dont take any more people, but if it is over 100 at 6am they do a raffle. what that means is that they take all of our names put it in a bucket and draw names until they get 100.. well there was about 130 of us and guess what number i was! umm, 100! can i please say that i never want to go through that again.. it was such an awesome feeling and a crazy rush, but i would rather not have to wait like that again. it was fun like always except for the pouring rain and the wind with up to 40mph gusts. yeah, i didn't sleep much. that leads me to last weekend, where we had our first snow of the year. about 3 inches. we worked half a day sat and got some stuff done as well as play in the snow.. :)
i house/dog sat for my old boss this past sat night and sunday. i don't think the dog was feeling so good. he peed 4 times inside and i wasn't even there for a full day! pour guy. sunday, i went to church with my 2nd family and then got lunch at ikea after. that place is way cool! i am so grateful for the fishers and how they make me feel like a part of their family. i also got to spend my time catching up with a girl i worked with this summer named beth anne. she is about 4 years younger than me, but is very mature for her age. i love seeing younger girls have such a strong love and devotion to the Lord. it is very encouraging to me. we caught up on school and boys (because we both had stories to tell about the men in our lives ;) which by the way can i just say i am a very blessed girl? well, i am and i do not deserve all that i have been given. i couldn't have written this story more perfectly. there really is beauty in the waiting :) the Lord is most certainly writing this love story better than i had even tried to play out in my head. i am grateful for a friendship that has now started a new journey and i am grateful for the time i have to spend with him and get to know him even more. thank you Lord for always blowing me away.
that brings me to today. nothing out of the ordinary happened, but i have learned to love the ordinary. to love the moment i am in with he people in my life. i couldn't ask for more. the interns led worship and prayer this morning for the staff. we made a slide show and had an audio we recorded and made as well. i think it went absolutely perfect. it was the Lord's doing for sure. i hope that other's felt Him move as much as i felt Him move in my heart. i may not live a life that is un-Christ like, but i know that i have not being living in a way that is Christ like if that makes sense. i've been living in the middle, the safe place. i wanna be on the other side. the side that shines so brightly for the Lord. that is what my heart was convicted for this morning. to live as a picture of Him is my longing, but man do i fall short. Lord, use me and mold me into the image of your son and forgive me when i live a safe comfortable life for myself rather than stepping out and living one that shines so brightly for you. Teach me to shine bright and teach me to live boldly. Amen.
i serve and believe in a God who is Emanuel. what other God is with us? none. Emanuel means God with us. Who better to serve that a God who is actually with us? Who better to love and give our lives to than one who lived and gave His life for us? none. Serve Him. Love Him. Live for Him.

in Him,
beth.