one place can hold so much meaning.

the past 3 nights/4 days i was blessed to have the opportunity to visit sandy cove and visit friends who have worked there in previous summers. i have been back to visit many times over the past 4 years, but this time i got to thinking about how much my life was dramatically changed by sandy cove and at sandy cove. i am sure that the same growth and changes would have also happened if i was somewhere else, but in my story sandy cove is where God chose for me to be. my first summer i was a 19 year old girl. i am now a 23 year old woman. wow, looking back is sometimes unbelievable. was i really that immature?? haha to become more mature we must have been immature at some point right? i defined my life and happiness by so many other things other than the Lord. i feel that there is far too much to write and i probably won't remember it all, but i will try to hit the main points. it was at sandy cove i grew up, i found my calling, i fell in love with the Lord, i found like-minded believers, i found a 2nd family, i learned what it meant to serve, i learned what brother's and sister's in Christ really look like, i learned that families face the same things mine did, but really can make it through if they work hard enough and run to the Lord. i learned so much more than i mentioned as well. how do you give back to a place that gave so much to you? my only conclusion is to give back to the Lord who gave me so much while i was there. i know that it was really the Lord working through sandy cove and that it was actually the Lord teaching me and not the place, but it was there it all took place. i walked the same paths i walked in the past 4 years, sat in the same spots i once used to sit in over the summers, and enjoyed the beauty like i have so many times in the past. my heart and my soul were warmed with the flooding of memories that had been made in my time there. i wish everyone could experience such change and growth in one place like i did. it makes visiting that much more special. to see how far i have come and how much the Lord really worked in me is an amazing emotion. it's almost too much to take in at once. so much emotion just wants to pour out of me. emotions of immense joy and thankfulness that God granted me the opportunity to grow and transform into who He wanted me to be all in one place. that one place i can visit and be reminded to thank Him for all He has done in and through me.

God, sometimes i don't have the words to tell you how thankful i am for what you have done for me. i am so thankful you brought me to a place where i knew you were working in me, where i saw your work in others, and where memories will remind me of Your greatness. thank you for using sandy cove as a tool in my life. what you have done over the past 4 years i will never forget. it was in the past 4 years that i believe the biggest transformation of my life took place and it was all because of You. You amaze me. You leave me speechless and for that I thank you. Thank you for being You, for blowing me away with your amazing love. Amen

thankfully,
beth.

sorry.

so, i went back and read some of my posts and i realized i have the worst grammar and spelling mistakes.. when i finish writing my blogs i am too lazy to go back and read over them. well, i realized that i look like i shouldn't have graduated high school so i will make a better effort to check for spelling and grammar errors.. thanks for understanding :)

playing a little catch up.

let's play a little catch up on the past 10 days. hmmm, lot's has happened. :) where to begin. well, last weekend i was the tnt host. there was one worker and his name was nate. it was a pretty busy weekend so we didn't get to play around too much. what we did get to do was have great conversations.. we shared our testimonies and some recent struggles and what God is doing in our lives. it's encouraging to see a 16 year old boy struggling to grow in his faith. even if it is struggling it is growing.. i was also encouraged by his honesty. when people are honest they can receive honest advice and help. i was able to encourage and give advice. it was awesome because i was nervous about how the weekend would play out with being a girl host working with one boy worker. i prayed that the Lord would allow us to connect in some way and use me in some way. i believe that prayer was answered! they always are. :) i tie-dyed a lot more on monday.. they turned out great and i even tried dying some gloves. they actually look cute! still selling all that stuff by the way. hahaha. anyways, on tuesday we were pleasantly surprised when Matt announced that we had a small day trip of canoeing planned. we packed a lunch and headed to a local park, put the canoe's in the water and made a day of it. our first stop was an island where we had lunch, a throwing contest, and then a devotional. after the devo was over matt asked us to go find a spot on the island to sit and think about some goals we have or wanted to make. it was a great time.. even though it was 20 mins, it was what i needed. i needed to think about what my goals were and are. of course i want to grow more and more into the image of Christ, but there are more than just that. i also want to put on love every day. i don't want to just say it, but live it. i want to lead someone to Christ this year, take advantage of every opportunity given to me to share the love of Christ, and to really be a light in this dark world. i mean a real bright bright light! those are some of the goals i had made.. after that we got back in the boats and paddled around until about 4. the midweek was pretty much normal.. did some cleaning, finished working on our initiative book, and did small jobs that needed to be done. i've been working out a lot lately instead of running. it really bums me out, but my feet have been going numb again. i guess surgery didn't work.. :( so i have turned over to doing a workout video by jillian michaels from the biggest loser. i really enjoy it! i know that was very random, but just thought i would share. on thursday evening the interns threw me a small birthday surprise celebration. can i just say how blessed i am to work with such awesome loving people?? i am! well it was a cheese party! haha the first one i have ever had. they had a platter of all kinds of cheeses, gold fish, queso and chips, easy cheese and crackers, cheese sticks, and pizza! it was sooooooo good. we watched up and also played settler's of canton. they also got me some gifts.. they got me a mug that they wrote on with nice words they thought described me.. they also got me vanilla creamer (yumm), my favorite flowers (fake ones that last forever yay!), and a tiara. :) it was a great night and our last one together until after break. my birthday was yesterday (saturday). i am 23. growing up is crazy. i don't feel any different than i did when i was a teenager, except more mature haha. i had to work, but was so blessed to get off early at 3:30 and was able to get a shower and get ready for the night. i had dinner and saw a movie with stephen and had a wonderful time. :) i received some great gifts from him and really couldn't have asked for a better night. :) :) :)
life is good. God is better. i need to be living with more love. i'm working and growing in that area. i also need to be consumed with Him. sometimes i find myself being consumed with things of the world instead of being consumed with Him to reach this world. today at church we sang the old song that goes..this is my story, this is my song, praising my Savior all the day long. i want to adopt that song for this time period. this is what i want to say, what i want to be living each and every day.. this is my story that i am living and the song that i am singing praising my Savior all the day long. what a great story to live and a great song to sing. i pray that will be the story i live- to praise my Savior all the day long.

living His story,
beth.

in 9 days.

my birthday is in 9 days. i'm not just trying to share that my birthday is soon just to share that it is my birthday. that day has deeper meaning for me this year. back in june i decided that i was going to commit the next 5-6 months to not dating.. it seems funny and doesn't seem very long, but i wanted to share about the journey i have had. i tend to date too fast, i tend to get distracted by finding the right person, and i tend to try and plan my own path. if i may be an honest girl right now, it is so hard to stay focused on the Lord when you are so focused on finding someone to spend your life with. common sense, right? right, but not always easy to stay focused. for me i was so focused on not being alone that i was missing out on what my single life could be. i was missing out on what God had called me to at that time, singleness. so, i took this time to free myself from even the chance of being distracted. that didn't mean that i couldn't be friends with guys. it just meant that i couldn't be consumed by thinking about finding someone. i am so grateful that this time has taught me so much. i finally have learned the true happiness of being single and trusting and waiting for the Lord to write my story. the Lord is writing my love story along with everyone else's. and how much more beautiful will my story be when i can say look how the Lord wrote my story, look how His perfect timing was better than my own. i am excited for the day when i can say that, but i am excited for today, for today is what i have. i do not have the future and i do not know the future. what i have now is today and what i know is to live for the Lord today, trusting that He is leading my every step. i am no longer consumed with thoughts or worries about planning my life. it's being planned for me. i can't say that i have got this trust thing 100% perfected, because i don't. some days weigh heavier than others. some days the spiritual attack is stronger, but now every day i know that i have someone fighting for me, someone perfectly writing my story, and with that in mind i don't need to worry. :) once my birthday hits, it's not like life changes and i am free to do what i want, but rather my life continues on the journey i have learned to live contently in, that i have learned to let Him write my story and trust that His story is far better than the story i could ever write.

in His story,
beth.

recruting, reunions, and retrreating.

so this past week has been extremely busy and filled with fun, relaxation, craziness, and joy. :) when i think about the Lord and how He has a perfect plan for me and my life it is hard not to be filled with joy, but at the same time it is hard to always think about His perfect plan. we doubt sometimes, me included..but this weekend and week were filled with joy and no doubting. :) last thursday me and 4 other RVR staff members headed down to good ole lynchburg, Va for a recruiting/ reunion trip. most of the staff here at the ranch came and come from Liberty so it's a perfect time to go and recruit and have a reunion with previous staff as well. all day friday we set up a booth telling students about the great opportunity we have to serve at the ranch and what it is all about. just spreading the word about the camp and getting e-mails to remind students that we would be back in january was our mission. we did accomplish that for sure. when i found out i was the intern going on this trip i was excited... excited to be reunited with family i had formed over the past 4 years. it was a little overwhelming almost to see everyone from those 4 years in just a few days, but more than overwhelming it was encouraging and wonderful to reconnect with those from my past. i miss the burg so much and the people i have grown to love as my family. but as much as i miss them i do know that i am where the Lord wants me. our friendships are not conditional and will pick up just where we left off when a visit occurs. i got to spend time with my mentor/ role model Donna. she is such an encouragement to me in my walk and such an inspiration to my goals of being a woman after God's own heart. i got to see my coaches who became so close to my heart and mean so much to me.. i saw teammates, friends, professors, and my church family. i couldn't have asked for a better weekend. we tailgated all day saturday and then watched the liberty football game. last home game of the season which we won by a blow out. my brother charlie came and visited and watched the game. it was great to see him.. he is growing faster than i expected.. he is a man! weird! i'm hoping he will end up at liberty.. be praying for that! we returned on sunday evening and the next day the interns and i packed up our bags and headed to gettysburg, Pa with matt, michelle, and baby Lilah for a relaxing 3 day retreat. we showed up to our little cabin and made it our home for the next few days.. we had nothing planned, but to relax, refuel, and connect with each other. the first day some of us hiked a bit and then played games and watched a movie. we played this game called settlers of catan. don't ask, but it is my new favorite board game! i still haven't won and i can't say it is everyone else's favorite, but they still play it with me! it's so much fun, go look it up! we played 3 times over the 3 day trip.. the game usually lasts 2 hours. :) saturday we had a big breakfast and then headed to historic gettysburg where we walked around battlefields and ended up spending most of our day at Devil's Den. look that up too and check it out. after we soaked in the views and history we started climbing all the massive rocks that were there! can we say so much fun!?!? take a bunch of camp staff to a place with big rocks and it won't be long until we are all over those things with shoes off and climbing in mind. we had some great climbs, which i am sure weren't safe, and some pretty cool pictures. after that we hit up the gettysburg outlets. there aren't many, but they were great! us girls only hit one store in the time we had, typical girls. :) ps. i need to go back there because in the food court there was this little shop that sold fruit smoothies and reminded me a bit of rita's, but made with real fruit and soooooo good. i got a mango/orange smoothie and wished i had 5 more to drink.. it was that good! so that is on my list of things to do again. :) the next day we took a hike, packed up, ate yummy veggie burgers, played settlers of catan, and then headed home.. it was a great relaxing lazy and active trip we all needed.

learning to accept His love,
beth.

to love and be loved.. that is the struggle.

oh man, it has been an eventful past few days.. not just with actual events, but with actual struggles and growth in my walk or better yet the beginning of great growth. first, i must start and bring everyone up to date on what has been going on in my life.. this weekend was the last weekend of corn maize and it was also the weekend that my first race took place! i was blessed to have my mother come and visit me and run the race with me. she did great for her first trail race plus having bad knees... i finished 2nd in my age division out of 18 girls and was the 5th overall girl to finish the race. =) not bad for a first timer. it was such a fun day because betsy and i both dressed up like waldo's girlfriend (she is real, look her up) for the race. i wore the same costume all day at the corn maize.. that night one of the full-time staff members had a costume party and i was a hippie.. go figure :) i have seen God working on me through people here at the ranch.. long story short God is so faithful, but that's nothing new. just wanted to let you know that my prayers are being answered right in front of my eyes. i am loving every aspect of the ranch, my fellow interns, the full-time staff, and the people i get to serve. my love for my fellow interns is growing and growing and i know they are becoming part of my family. it is not always easy to love.. we have days where it is just plain hard.. there are days people are just plain hard to love, but you wanna know my greater struggle than loving others? it is accepting Christ's love. to be completely honest, that is what i am struggling with.. i love Him oh, how i love Him, but i am having a hard time accepting and knowing His love.. my mind is so limited to knowing that type of love.. we don't experience that type of love anywhere else but from Him from Christ himself and since i only know the love i have felt on this earth it is so hard for me to wrap my mind around the fact that his love is different... His love is limitless. yes, i know these things, but to truly feel it, to truly believe it, to truly live it.. that is my struggle. Lord, open my heart to accepting and knowing all the love you have for me. i know there is nothing i can do to earn or lose His love for me, but why does my mind work like it does? to accept your love, the love you have for me that is never ending, that is my desire.. to love and be loved by you.

learning to accept His love,

beth.