in 9 days.

my birthday is in 9 days. i'm not just trying to share that my birthday is soon just to share that it is my birthday. that day has deeper meaning for me this year. back in june i decided that i was going to commit the next 5-6 months to not dating.. it seems funny and doesn't seem very long, but i wanted to share about the journey i have had. i tend to date too fast, i tend to get distracted by finding the right person, and i tend to try and plan my own path. if i may be an honest girl right now, it is so hard to stay focused on the Lord when you are so focused on finding someone to spend your life with. common sense, right? right, but not always easy to stay focused. for me i was so focused on not being alone that i was missing out on what my single life could be. i was missing out on what God had called me to at that time, singleness. so, i took this time to free myself from even the chance of being distracted. that didn't mean that i couldn't be friends with guys. it just meant that i couldn't be consumed by thinking about finding someone. i am so grateful that this time has taught me so much. i finally have learned the true happiness of being single and trusting and waiting for the Lord to write my story. the Lord is writing my love story along with everyone else's. and how much more beautiful will my story be when i can say look how the Lord wrote my story, look how His perfect timing was better than my own. i am excited for the day when i can say that, but i am excited for today, for today is what i have. i do not have the future and i do not know the future. what i have now is today and what i know is to live for the Lord today, trusting that He is leading my every step. i am no longer consumed with thoughts or worries about planning my life. it's being planned for me. i can't say that i have got this trust thing 100% perfected, because i don't. some days weigh heavier than others. some days the spiritual attack is stronger, but now every day i know that i have someone fighting for me, someone perfectly writing my story, and with that in mind i don't need to worry. :) once my birthday hits, it's not like life changes and i am free to do what i want, but rather my life continues on the journey i have learned to live contently in, that i have learned to let Him write my story and trust that His story is far better than the story i could ever write.

in His story,
beth.